Childhood Memories

One late afternoon, I saw a familiar girl while I was in the Iriga Public Market. It was my classmate during nursery, the best student in our class as I remember it. I barely had any reason to get her attention because we’ve only became classmates for a year. Obviously, she wouldn’t recognize me so I didn’t bother. Walking towards each other, I almost knocked her off but luckily she managed to take a brief look at me, avoiding the accident. One thing that startled me was the moment when she looked at me. She still looks the same after almost fifteen years, which further reinforces her image on my memory. I cannot recall any moment that we spent together when we were classmates. We neither became friends nor rivals in academic sense. I was too indifferent back then, did not really care about things around me. That short confrontation, as I would call it, did not spark my thoughts about her memory but events during my short childhood that changed my life forever.

I started to become a serious student when I was on first grade. I tried to be the best as I can, treating all my classmates as co-competitors for academic excellence. I was certain that I would be the best student on our class. Yet on our recognition day, I only received second honors and a minor award of ‘Best in Reading.’ I knew I was better in other subjects as well. I suspected that there is something wrong with the computations of our final grades but I only kept on myself because I thought my teachers would do such ridiculous thing.

I doubled my efforts on my second grade. Now I’m pretty sure that I excelled on all our subjects. One unusual instance happened on a quiz about fractions. After our teacher finished giving the quiz, we started checking our papers and it appears that she was giving the wrong answer key. I am sure that she listed the items to be classified as proper, improper, and mixed fractions – I also did one on a separate sheet of paper. I would like to complain about this anomaly but again, I thought her headache that she had earlier might have twisted her judgment a bit. But still, that’s ridiculous. Consequently, I got a low grade on that quiz, luckily some items on the answer key were correct, but that was still unfair.

I don’t know what exactly happened but after that incident, things seemed to be worsening for me as the days approach for that year’s recognition rights. A few months prior to that date, my class adviser resigned and she was replaced by a lot more younger teacher. I suspected that there is something wrong with her appointment. You can call me paranoid or something else because I thought my other teachers are using their influence to turn her against me in favor of another student. I’m still eager to prove myself to them but as days go by, my doubt about their ‘plans’ are getting stronger.

Recognition day came. I received the invitation early morning that same day then I excitedly turned the pages to see the honor roll of our class. The results shocked and angered me. I only received 1st honorable mention with a consolation award of ‘Best in Math.’ One thing that further enraged me is that I’m tie with another student, which makes my ranking 3.5th or far worse would be 4th since her surname appears first in alphabetical order. I cannot accept that my teachers cheated me in such humiliating manner. My mother couldn’t help cheering me while saying that I should forgive them on what they’ve done and that I can’t do anything about it. So I’m just supposed to accept it no matter how it hurts? That is ridiculous! If I’ve let my fury take over me, I’d tear that invitation in front my teachers and then walk out in that recognition rights. But instead, I kept it on myself and never spoke a thing about it on that occasion because they expect me to just accept their humiliation on me.

A nine year old couldn’t do anything about the wicked system they’re implementing and it will continue to be so unless challenged with enough resistance. That would be the last day that I would be a student of that school. I decided to walk away from that chance to fight for justice that I deserve. I think that rotten system would continue to persist as long as there are people like them. I started anew in a public school where I know there would be adequate opportunity to grow and prove myself, free from any prejudice.

I know I did the right choice. I wouldn’t be here where I am now without enough exposure to excel and I couldn’t be more thankful with all the support of I got from everyone around me then. I still feel bitter on all the concerned people, with direct and indirect involvement, that caused me that psychological damage though ironically, I’m thankful that they made me take the path I’m currently in. I’m not done yet of building my ideal self but when that time comes, I will make sure that they will know and feel it.